"If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man's life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility."
--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Commentary
Too many people are focused on their wounds and pain to do this. They rather focus on their hurts and sufferings instead of the pain of another individual. Many rather rehearse their past, than get over their past.
Understanding why a person has done something harmful to us can be very helpful. Maybe they hurt us because they felt we put them in a corner and they fought back. Maybe we triggered something in their past. Maybe they just don't know how to relate to people. Maybe they misinterpreted something we said or did. Maybe we are this person-do we want grace from others? Then we must give it to others.
Understanding a person's action does not necessary mean accepting their actions. If a person does something wrong we should never accept it, but at times we need to separate them from their actions. We need wisdom on how to handle each situation.
Some people are just mean, hateful people-stay away from them.